Dear (Host of Show),- Host reads letters that are portrayed to be letters from regular watchers seeking life advice for a variety of outlandish problems. Running gag will be host searching for his new letter opener (sword, lighting the envelope on fire, bee bee gun, he can't find the letter opener so he opens it with his teeth). Host calls upon bizarre nature of his upbringing to give unusual advice, (Craig Ferguson often talks about 'In Britain we do things differently...if this host from say Topeka, Kansas, he would say something like "Like most children from Topeka, Kansas I was educated by an enormous benevolent snake, and that snake told me once..." Another running gag would be one of the letters being from a daughter he abandoned back in his home town pleading for him to return home, which the host hastily skips through after reading just enough for the audience to realize the joke.
Latest Pyramid Scheme The Host Has Bought Into- Host gives sales pitch to undesirable product or investment that he has recently bought a large quantity of or staked the show's financial future on. Sales pitch can vary from host attempting to sell a line of cosmetics that he displays by applying them to his own face, tries to sell an assembly-required motorcycle by showing how easy to assemble himself, or perhaps an enormous mystery box
What's In The Host's Pocket?- Host scrounges through pocket and uncovers random items and is forced to give explanations for what he finds. Examples: urine sample ("All late night hosts have to get tested since they busted Steve Allen for Human Growth Hormone back in '59), atm receipt for $800 withdrawal at 3am, ("Addiction is a horrible thing, and makes you take drastic actions. Whether it be cigarettes, cocaine, or in my case, super deluxe custard cream pies, sometimes you just need your fix), long-haired red wig ("I star as Ariel in an off-broadway musical production of The Little Mermaid").
I really hate writing desk pieces, and I really was just trying to get through these. I riff off things, not create formats. This is shit.
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Change 'Steve Allen in '59' to 'Milton Berle in '57'. It's always better when you can turn something into a dick joke.
ReplyDeleteI'm a huge fan of the pyramid scheme one, especially since it makes the entire show look like it's barely holding on, giving it this scrappy underdog feel. the "What's in my pocket" one seems like it would be funny, but it would be harder to introduce, and more obvious - "Hey, audience! What's in my pocket today! I bet something whacky!"
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